Hi, I'm Grant

I live in California and I am a business attorney. I'm a Mormon.

About Me

I am married to a wonderful wife and we have six children (three married and three in college) and currently six grandchildren. I love my family and enjoy spending time with them. We love playing board games. Two of our sons actually created their own board game which we often play when we are together.

I also like to garden. It is a nice break from the stress of being an attorney. One of my sons and I built a three pool stone water fountain in our front yard. Another son help me build a curved stone path lined with lilies. We live in Southern California, so we have great weather that allows us to grow various types of palms and several tropical plants, including some exotic fruits such as passion fruit, loquats, and bananas.

I am also the managing partner of a law firm, so I deal with both litigation and transactional legal matters, as well as a lot of administrative and employee related issues throughout the workweek.

Why I am a Mormon

I am a Mormon because I know that the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is God’s only duly authorized church on the Earth. I realize that most other religions teach a lot of truth and do a lot of good, but this Church is His Church. I am also a Mormon because I have felt God’s love heal my soul. I know that Jesus is the Christ, and that through Him we all can be saved if we turn to Him and allow Him to convert us.

A number of years ago, while I was in the midst of a personal crisis, my wife mentioned that she felt the issue I was dealing with was part of a much bigger picture. She felt that in some unknown way it was related to a couple of business failures I experienced several years earlier. This rang true. I knew she was right, even though there was no apparent connection.

I yearned to see this bigger picture. I turned to the Lord and was willing to do whatever He required. I placed everything on the altar and did not hold back any sacred cows. I was willing to sacrifice what I thought was a basic characteristic of my personality, being an entrepreneur. I told the Lord that if it was His will, I would become a teacher or pursue some other line of work that would facilitate me spending more time at home. I was willing to abandon my insatiable quest for financial security, which had dominated much of my life up to that point in time. I turned my whole heart over to the Lord and humbly asked for help.

I was then blessed with one of the greatest experiences of my life. It is best understood by visualizing the image impressed on my mind at the time. I saw a large, flat, dark body of water extending as far as I could see in every direction. This sea of darkness was not black, but very dark and gloomy. The finger of the Lord came down and touched the water. Then, this sea of darkness opened up in all directions, just as a drop of oil on water spreads out quickly in all directions, and I saw a bright light shining up out of the opening. As the water opened up, the light became brighter and brighter, and I felt my sins being washed away at the same time the emptiness in my life was filled.

As the light grew brighter I could see the source of my problems and how I had hurt others close to me. I could see how I spent much of my life trying to fill emotional deficiencies created by growing up in a dysfunctional family that moved on the average of every nine months. I could see how I attempted to fill these emotional holes in inappropriate ways.

I could see that I, not my wife, was the cause of much of our marital difficulties. I was shocked! No, this couldn’t be me. But it was. I could hardly stand to look at myself. I was repulsed by my past behavior, just as two magnets with the same polarity are repulsed by each other when shoved together. The Lord propelled me in the opposite but correct direction by forcing me to see my faults; yet, He empowered me with hope. I knew everything would be fine. I no longer felt the emptiness that compelled so much of my past behavior. The Lord’s love filled the hole. The light seemed synonymous with the emotion of hope and power that grew as the light became brighter. I could see clearer, until everything was bright and I was completely filled with joy, hope and love. What glory! What light! What love! I can’t describe it.

I felt as if I were born again. I was freed from all that held me bound. I was no longer held captive by the emotional black holes that pulled me down. I no longer had any desire to sin. After feeling the Lord’s love and acceptance, everything that bothered me no longer was important. I felt free to love others without fear of rejection. I no longer felt driven to prove myself. My anxiety dissipated and I felt at peace. I felt healed from all my sins. I was free.

I now realize that the sea of darkness represented my heart, and as I opened it up to God, he filled my soul with light and love. I know the Lord is there, waiting to fill your life with love if you will simply open up your heart to Him.

Personal Stories

In what ways have your prayers been answered?

PRAYER IS THE KEY

Even though we moved, on the average, every nine months while I was growing up and I was quite used to change, the first day of high school was scary. Everything seemed new and ominous.

During P.E. the coach assigned all of us combination locks for our gym lockers. Unfortunately, the coach ran out of class time to issue all of the locks, and I was one of the last persons to receive a lock and combination. Consequently, I was running late to get to my next class, so I quickly looked at the combination on the little slip of paper and stuck it in my pocket as I ran to my next class.

However, when I sat down in the next class and looked for the combination in my pocket, so that I could write it down in my binder and try to memorize it, the combination was nowhere to be found. Fear hit me like a sledgehammer. There was no way that I could remember the combination, as I had only briefly scanned it as I put it in my pocket. I retraced my steps and looked everywhere, but I could not find the combination anywhere.

Well, time is a good ally, so I decided to see if it would solve the dilemma. At first it was not a problem. We were not required to dress down for P.E. for a few days, so not being able to open my locker was not a big deal. Regardless, the inevitable doom weighed heavily on my mind. I decided to try to remember the combination, so during lunch and after school I would go by the gym and try different combinations in an attempt to open the lock, all to no avail.

The fateful day arrived and we were required to dress down for P.E. class. I was somewhat shy and fearful of authority figures, but seeing that there was now no alternative, I mustered up the nerve to go see the coach and confess that I had lost my locker combination and I could not remember it.

Of course the coach made it seem like it was not as big of a problem as I had feared; but, when he looked in his master list, he told me the bad news: the lock I was issued was not a school lock and they did not have its combination. Apparently, some student had lost his lock the prior year and substituted a store-bought lock in its place. The coach said that if I could not remember the combination, he would have to cut off the lock and I would have to buy a new one to replace it.

We were poor, so I did not know if we had enough money to buy a lock. It was a slow walk home from school that day. My mother confirmed my worst suspicion when I asked her if I could buy a lock at the store for $3.50. Now I had a real problem. I could not remember my combination, we did not have money to replace the lock, and if I did not dress down during P.E. it would affect my grade.

As the week progressed, each day the coach would dock my grade until I reached the point that if I did not dress down one more time I would receive a failing grade for P.E. Bear in mind that P.E. was a required course for all semesters to graduate from high school. I was in a panic. I had only been in high school for two weeks and I was not ever going to graduate. My whole life would be a failure.

Needless to say, I was in the gym every chance I got trying every combination that would pop into my brain. I tried systematic approaches. I tried familiar sounding combinations. You name it, and I tried it, all without any success.

Finally, the last day before I would fail P.E. and not be able to graduate from high school, I was in the gym after school continuing to try different combinations. I realized that it was impossible for me to remember the combination. The only solution was to turn to the Lord and ask for help.

I waited until all of the football players were dressed and had left the locker room. I kneeled down and humbly and desperately pled with the Lord to help me in my predicament. I then got up from my knees, took the lock in my hand and turned the combination to 17 – 10 – 24. Pop. It opened right up! I was so shocked that I almost didn’t remember the combination.

I learned a great lesson that day: earnest prayer is the combination that unlocks the treasure chest of heaven. Perfunctory prayer does not cut it. But, when we pray with the same desperation as Moses did when trapped next to the Red Sea by Pharaoh’s army, we are open to receive revelation. I find it interesting that in the Sermon on the Mount, Christ promises to fill us with the Holy Ghost if we hunger and thirst after righteousness as one starving yearns for food and water.

God respects us and our free will. Consequently, he waits for us to invite Him into our life. Therefore, let’s remember to pray earnestly every day and invite God to fill us with His spirit, so we will be open to receive Him and the blessings He wants to give us.

How I live my faith

The Church does not have a paid ministry, so all of the members are asked to assist in various ways. Currently, I serve in the church in a variety of ways. 1) I am in charge of coordinating a group of about a dozen families in our congregation (“ward”) to clean our meeting house for a week every two months; 2) I am the scout committee chairman for the scout troop sponsored by our ward; 3) I am the secretary for a men’s group in our ward; 4) I visit a few of the members of our ward on at least a monthly basis to bring them a spiritual message and see if they have any needs we can assist with; and 5) various teachers in our ward regularly ask me to substitute teach lessons for them when they will be out of town or otherwise not able to attend.

I also formed a non-profit corporation to promote the production, publication and distribution of uplifting materials in all forms of media. This non-profit organization also donates many copies of a book I authored to prisons and jails in various states across the country in hopes that it will help some individuals deal with their emotional challenges and turn to Christ. I periodically receive very touching letters from prisoners who mention that this book has been instrumental in helping them turn their life around.

Of course, I try to live my faith by following the Savior's example in my interactions with my family and in my dealings with others. I try to be a positive influence on those I meet, whether it is simply similing at someone as our paths cross in the supermarket, to spending time helping someone deal with a crisis in their life.

How can we stop the spread and influence of pornography?

Grant answered...

I believe individuals need to seek and feel God’s love, and society needs stronger families, in order to stem the spread and influence of pornography. Other efforts may be helpful, but I feel that these two concepts are the key to overcoming the tsunami of filth that is engulfing society. Let me explain why.

We each have a spark of divinity within us that connects us all to each other. This is what makes us different from all other creatures. It is how we instinctively know right from wrong, regardless of our culture or upbringing.

God is love. Because we all have a spark of His divinity in us, we all have an innate basic need to love and to be loved. However, because we are born into an imperfect world, all of us have been disappointed and let down by others we depend on. This creates an emotional vacuum that sucks us down like an emotional black hole.

All of us have some emotional deficiency resulting from being raised by imperfect parents in an imperfect world. However, in some people these emotional holes are extremely large due to abuse and neglect. As the quality of family life deteriorates in society, more individuals have greater emotional black holes that pull them down with an ever increasing force.

We all are subconsciously searching for ways to fill our emotional holes that were created by a lack of love. Unfortunately, some people seek to fill their emotional emptiness with things that are very destructive such as drugs or alcohol. Many of us take good things to an extreme in an effort to fill our emotional needs. Some people seek the rigidity of rules and strict discipline to give themselves a false sense of control, while others reject almost all restrictions in hope of escaping from the emptiness that haunts them. However, none of these things fill our needs. Consequently, our emotional needs often grow because we are looking for love in all the wrong places.

This is particularly evident regarding issues of sexuality. Intimate sexual relations with one’s spouse can be one of the most physically and emotionally fulfilling expressions of love we experience. Consequently, it is natural for someone seeking love to try to simulate this experience. However, a counterfeit experience does not satisfy the desire for an intimate loving relationship. Instead, it leaves the participant empty with an even greater emotional black hole that pulls him down.

This subconscious quest to fill our personal emotional void has a greater impact on our lives than we probably realize. Additionally, while we are searching for ways to fill our own emotional emptiness, we leave potholes behind us in the lives of individuals who are close to us, especially our children who depend upon us for their understanding of love and how to relate to others. This perpetuates the draw of inappropriate behavior, particularly pornography and illicit sexual activity. Yet, the same emptiness that haunts us acts as the impetus for the search to find God, who is the only thing great enough to fill the emotional black hole at the center of each individual’s personal universe.

The only way to actually fill the emotional void that was created by a lack of love is to turn to the spark of divinity that is in each of us, and follow it. God, who is love, is the only source great enough to completely fill our personal emotional black hole.

We draw closer to God by following that spark of divinity in each of us that directs us to know what is right and true. The more we seek light and truth, the closer we draw to God, and He fills our life with His love. The more we follow the impressions we have of what is right, the more we are able to recognize that guiding divine light within us and we become more secure because we know who we really are. We become more whole and more connected with other individuals and with humanity. We become more at peace with ourselves and the universe, and our anxiety decreases.

The more we follow that internal divine spark of the light of Christ within us, the more we submit to Him, until we completely submit and open ourselves to Him. He then is able to fully fill our emotional holes with love and liberate us from the draw of our emotional black hole and eliminate the allure of pornography and other destructive behavior. We then feel a broader spectrum of emotions more intensely. Gratitude fills our life with joy and peace. It is as if we are born again into a more full and abundant life.

Once our own emotional holes are filled, we are freed to love others more deeply and broadly. We become less concerned with ourselves and more interested in others. The depth of our love increases. At the same time the breadth of our love, or the number of people we care for, increases. Our families will become stronger and allure of pornography and other counterfeit love substitutes for our children will decrease. In the process, we also become more like God because we feel more love for others.
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Chris answered...

Since I do not think legislation will ever be enacted against it, we will have to stop it one person at a time. I think the key to this is placing the proper barriers between your life and the damning influence of pornography. That means staying away from unwholesome places, and putting the proper protections on your electronic devices. It also means controlling your thoughts.

Can a husband and wife be together forever? Do Mormons believe that families will live together in heaven?

Amanda answered...

YES!!! This is one of my favorite parts of the gospel. I believe that my family will live together in heaven. I will know my family as my family members. My husband is my husband for now and for all eternity. My children are my children here on earth and for all eternity. I know that if something happened to one of us that I will see them again. I love this about the church. Before joining, I always had a question about this concept and when taking the discussions from the missionaries this came up. Makes me love the church more and more.